d life of d.S.1

again, dis piece of material is written when i m in d camp.. jhehe

as a fren n sometimes as a leader, i m very scared 2 let pp down, disappointed. n as a fren, i m very scared 2 ignore them, let them feel ignored n lonely. there r times when everybody gets sad o hepi, n i think i m owes d 1st 1 2 b there wv them, 2 share their sadness o joy. it’s bcz i want them 2 know dat they r not alone. they hv frens.. n i will owes b there when they need help..

jz like liverpool slogan.. "u’ll nvr walk alone".. dis is an amazing quote.. it is hard 2 xpress our problems. bt i think sometimes i can notice thru d way they talk, they react n from their facial xpressions. sometimes i will like 2 try 2 approach them n help 2 solve problems. bcz of dis, sometimes i neglect my studies n dont score good results in exams. i’ll rather put other pp ahead of me.

i personally feel dat these exams, studies r nothing cz it is jz like a measurement 2 measure where our standard is. it’s nothing, jz a piece of cert. bt soon, i realize dis word "knowledge" comes in . i try 2 convince myself, if i dont study, i’ll hv no knowldege. n wvout knowledge, i wont b able 2 assist n help my frens. wat i want 2 c is their smiles. when they’re hepi, i think i’ll oso b hepi. i seldom think 4 mysealf.

sometimes i overdo it.. n dis cause a lot of damage 2 myself n oso other individual. i learn from d STE camp, d word 2 describe my doins r selfless. okay.. selfless. sometimes, i was scoled "stupid" by my frens bcz they said dat though i sacrifice so many things 4 other pp, mayb other pp wont appreciate. well, thanks, folks. i oso know dis thing so i hv 2 admit i m stupid.. well, dat’s y i call myself as "d.S.1"….

i know dat not everybody will appreciate, bt at least i do my part as a fren or a leader. i can say myself is a responsible person. i learn dis from my moral class. responsible is an attitude o action oso shown when nobody is watchin. i know mayb nobody will appreciate wat i hv done, bt i jz do it.

i learn 2 b humble n not 2 b too arrogant. i wont walk around spreadin wat i’ve done. bla bla bla.. bt i will jz stay silent n hepi. dis is y i don want 2 neglect any of my frens. i want 2  b there wv them when they r alone, i wan 2 c their smiling faces.. hohohoho

n i don like 2 let pp down, as a leader especially. i learn a lot of things. i know when 2 differentiate time 2 b serious n playful. when it’s a formal o serious issue, i’ll b serious, 100% commited. n when it’s time 2 play, i can play very crazily till i take off my shirts. n i oso wanna tek dis opportunity 2 say sorry cz i owes kacau pp when pp is studyin cz i tek studies not seriously..

dis is wat i receive from my frens. some of them ask me how i manage my emotions n leadership skills? well, i jz answer 1 word "commitment", in watever we’re doin, we muz hv 100% commitment in ourselves, so dat we wont let d pp down. i hope i’ll b a better leader, a mo understandin leader.

now is 2008. n i think i m sure of my target now. i’ll hv 2 prepare myself 4 my ultimate goal, which is 2 make other pp hepi. jz simple miles on their faces will make me hepi. well, bt now hv 2 study hard dluu. lord , grant me d serenity 2 accept d things i cant change, courage 2 change d things i can n wisdom 2 know d differences…

mainly, 4 my parents. i can say dat i can feel dat they r proud of me so as i m proud of them. mayb often pp asked y i bhv so good n so responsible. many timesi 4get 2 mention my parents… they r my motivator, my light n my source of energy. i pick up their wonderful values, responsibility from dad, patience from mum n love from both of them…

sometimes i feel dat god is unfair. i m very scared dat 1 day, He will took my parents away from me.. n i can feel dat i will b very very very angry n upset bout it cz i feel dat i hv not accomplish my responsibility as a responsible child .. 2 my parents..

sometimes, i often talk very rudely 2 them jz because they nage 2 me. n may often i realize dat i should receive n tek their advices bt instead of listenin 2 them, i response by talkin rudely 2 them. dis is d point dat i would like 2 change bout me.. i hv 2 b mo patient n tok 2 them nicely though i m not feeling good @ dat time. i know wat they advise me is good, so , i muz try 2 accpet wat they r sayin 2 me..

1 day, i will bcome a parent, a dad. so i hv 2 b obedient 2 my paretns. i love them very much, bt it seems dat everytime i go bek 2 my house. i seldom spend time wv them. instead, i spend mo time wv my frens n in d school.. pooh…

there’s big sacrifices dat my parents did 4 me in d year of 2007. reli.. not many parents can afford dat price n pressure. bt my parents did.. i reli spend a big amount of $ in my education in taylor, 20 times of flight in & out, much more on my daily xpenses n my telephone bills. i know dat when i total up, it’ll b like rm 30,000. n it’s a reli big amount of $$$. bt they jz do it wv a simple reason "we trust u n know dat u r sure of wat u r doin. we hope u r hepi…" dat’s wat my mom tells me when i say sorry 2 her 4 wastin so much $$ in 2007..

now, i promise them i will study reli hard n try 2 b graduated successfully n hv a stable job at d end of my carrier. den i will give some allowance 2 them though i know dat $ cant resemble my love 2 them. i know dis petronas job is goin 2 keep me away from my family members. so whenevea i hv time, i will owes come bek 2 visit them no matter wat it costs.. n hope so i will work in a place nearby my sibu

mayb i m still not independent.. bt many things i do it on my own cz i scare dat i will tired them. they hv their own things 2 do n their own problems 2 solve, n their own pressures 2 handle. so many things i do it on my own, bt i think i m still depend on them. i wish i can duplicate myself, 1 4 my own, 1 4 my parents, 1 4 my frens…

parents… daddy n mommy.. i know mayb dis sem’s result mayb not so good cz i tek d tests as a small case n i din look seriously on d test. n i think mayb d way 2 make my parents proud of me is 2 b a successful person.. n i oso think dis is d only wishes of many parents 2wards their children. n we r owes a baby in our parents mind though we r mature n married.. haha

n i hope they hv a healthy body n free from o sickness.. so, o those sickness, AIDS, cancer, flu, demam, osteoroposis, joint problem, please come 2 me, not 2 my parents.. come 2 me, let me handle 4 them.. please God, tek good k of my parents, don let them fall in2 any traps, provide them a healthy body.. please, i only pray 4 dis… please god…..

i think i cant write long cz my tears r rollin down now.. daddy n mommy, give me time n i’ll do my bez 2 b a responsible son, a baby dat daddy n mommy proud of…

dis blog is written when i m in port dickson, nothing 2 do mar. plus no laptop there. so jz write on d piece of paper den i type in2 my blog.. and it is written on 1/1/08.. hoho

normally, pp owes hv their new targets and their new mission n goals in the new year. bt dis year, in 2008, i feel like i hv no target, i jz dono y. i feel mt n feel like i got everythin ady. i was quite confused. n i oso dono how 2 describe d feeling. i  jz feel dat 2008 is jz another day. there’s no difference btween 31/12/07 n 1/1/08. of cz got some difference la, hehe, receive many blessing messages. bsides dat, i feel nothing.

new target? new mission? new goal? i wan a new target so dat i can go n chase afta it. so dat i can pursue afta it. bt wat r my targets? wat r my objectives of life? wat do i hv 2 do 2 make myself hepi n contented? thousands of question popped when i was thinking of my objectives of new year…

mayb 2 continue 2 b my own d.S.1? now i would like 2 question myself, wat is d real definition of d.S.1, can it b applicalbe 2 other pp? muz it only 4 me? wat is so different bout me if compared 2 other pp? m i so different? ok i think i fot d answer, i m actually jz an ordinary human. 2 hands, 2 legs, nothing peculiar about me..

bt i think mayb is my mentality n mayb my way of thinkin keeps me strong. i m not d smartest o d most intelligent person, bt i hv d strongest will, confidence, perseverance, deteremination, enthusiasm n commitment. dat’s y i think i m different gua.i owes put other pp ahead of myself. i think dis is seldom seen in d society. i feel dis is good attitude, bt 1 day, i was puzzled when somebody say i m selfish

i try 2 understand d situation, i din make any xplanation 2 her comment. i jz try 2 understan, bt i reli cant imagine o understand d situation. everybody is selfish? i don think so. ok, i agree wv u , bt i’ll keep things simple. when i say i keep things simple, means i think it in my own way. if u say everybody is selfish, den how bout stevie g? he oso selfish? he rejected chelsea n continue to captain liverpool 2 their successvie 5th champions league cup. is he selfish>. if he;s selfish, den he would have gone 2 chelsea n see his liverpool devastated wvout him..

from dis , i know sth. if u reli k 4 a person o a thing u like, u’ll sacrifice urself n will not act selfish. i think so like dis, i like my frens n my school, i often sacrifice my time, my energy n even my own freedom 4 them. m i selfish? M i??? 4 me, i don think so. 4 u, mayb i m. bt now i hv a strong point 4 myself. i kon k how other pp look @ me, as long as hw i judge myself. well, d eyes tumbuh @ ur head, i cant control it. bt, i respect u 4 ur opinions.. thanks…

2 put other pp ahead of myself, is dis my new objective? i jz hv 2 continue it? wat;s my definition of d.S.1? dare 2 b angry, dare 2 voice up, dare 2 do, dare 2 bear d responsibility? wes there when needed though r not been asked, a good ploanner n leader? is dat d real definition of d.S.1? now another question comes in, actually everybody is different from 1 another. bt i don k la.. u can say i m arrogant o wuliao 4 callin myself as d.S.1 bt i think i m reli d.S.1. lulu lulu…

if u doubt me, y don u b another d.S.1? actually, everybody whud try 2 b a d.S.1. reli. i hope i m not confused. so mayb my new objective is 2 continue 2 b d.S.1 gua… haiz, conclusion, my new year objective .. is still….  X-files, an unendin hymn, asn unsoluble question.

hope i can find my answers n my inspirations …. soon..

Here is d review of my 2007. honestly, i think 2007 is a lucky year, cz i like d number 7, bt it turns out 2 b quite a lucky n troublesome year 4 me.. hehe, so 1 word 2 describe my 2007 is "magnificent".. here r some interesting things dat happen 2 me in 2007… hehe..

Bez fren i know: Taylor -> Colin Chong Wei Ming (somebody say he looks like my brother)

                         SHS -> Frederick Lee Yong Fong (everytime i com bek, he sure is d 1st person 2 call me out yumcha n organie some activities 4 us)

                        UTP -> Ting Sing Tat (hehe, he oso know how 2 speak foochow maer~~ so, owes speak wv him in uni)

Best on9 frens: Lee Shih Sian (haha, she’s d bez, i guess. everytime i got problem, i’ll tok 2 her on9. well, she provides good advices dat help me go thru difficult moment.. haha)

Proudest moment of 2007: when i mount d SHS stage 2 receive my last award (SPM award) as a SHS student. it’s my last chance.. i cry dat day

Saddest moment of 2007: when i leave Taylor. they oso hv an emo session. thanks, taylor S4, u guys reli r good frens.. nvr regret knowin u guys..

Hepiest moment of 2007: everytime i come bek.. it’s nice 2 b at home where can meet old frens playin futbo, yumcha, n visit school teachers n headmaster n frens in d church..

Craziest moment of 2007: goin wv a bunch of frens 2 proclaim d independence of malaysia in utp. we oso walk around d whole uni n shout Merdeka 2 every1.. we even scolded by other pp.. haha

Most regret moment of 2007: when i leave SHS.. reli.. i reli wanna stay wv SHS n c how i can help d school n wat will i achive in school.. bt now, i can jz help SHS as a senior n old boy..

Scariest moment of 2007: when i was trapped in d lift 4 an hour.. pooh, imagine 19 person inside d lift. bt anyway, d moral lesson was shortened 2 1 hour only.. hohohohohoho

Best thing i lov bout my school: Every staffs.. n oso Stamford Bridge of SHS.. hehe

Johnny’s book of record: i tek planes 20 times dis year.. makes me d most xpensive person.. haiz.. reli waste a lot of $$

Most regret deeds: actually i score mo den 100 goals bt i din count cz d goals i score in utp r not challenging.. it’s simple abc.. so i din count..

D goal i like: when i slide n score d bo at same time. now i ady score 7 goals like dat. 5 times in sports complex, subang; 1 time in utp; 1 time in my beloved SHS~~~ i reli enjoyed dat.. hehe..

Favourite Chinese song: 无条件为你 - 梁静茹

Favourite English song: You’ll b in my heart - Phil Collins

D thing i dislike most: Pp talkin rumours n spreading it.. (reli cant tahan.. something fake can oso bcom true…)

Gifts from Heaven:

1. when i score d winning goal 4 my futbo team in d competition, d goal was scored from d middle half. i still remember how i score. d bo was strucky by my rite foot n d bo accelerate n slow accelerate n slow, n it enters d net. d most meaningful part is d match is against d former champion.. another meaningful part is dat we r d champion dat year. n lastly we emerged as champion afta 4 years of losing.. hehe

2. when d SPM result was announced. i count myself as very very lucky.. cz i m not so good. i think i din deserve d result.10A1, 1A2, 1B4. so i will thank god cz he makes impossible things possible. i remember everytime i pray i say: god, i don wanna pray 4 good results, i jz wanna pray 4 great determination n hardworkin in myself. n he reli answers my prayer..

3. Petronas scholarship. actually i put a lot of effort in JPA. i prefer JPA cz JPA can go overseas. bt petronas cant.. bt i reli hv 2 thank god again, cz once again, he makes impossible things possible. haha, durin d educamp. actually our school SHS got 6 students goin 4 d educamp. n where there’s 2 johnnys, there’s chaos. me n another johnny + frederick fool around in d camp. haha, we even shh by other participants. we jz play play inside. n i still remember there’s UEFA Champions League at dat time. 1 is manu vs roma where manu score 7 goals thrashing.. n another is chelsea vs valencia, where essien’s last minute decisive goal makes chelsea thru wv 2-1 score. n i was d only participant who went out 2 d coffee shop 2 watch d match. n d interview even worse. i dono hv 2 tok bout d things on d paper, i was sendiri syok sendiri tellin them my biodata n my school till i was asked 2 stop n they ask me xplain d things on d paper.. memalukan saje.. bt anyway, i get d petronas scholarship.. reli thanks god.

4. i hope d 4th gift of heaven will come 2 me soon gua…

Gifts from Heaven.. sometimes, i reli like God, n we hv 2 pray 2 him.. everybody has his o her own religion, we muz stick 2 our religion n nvr doubt his ability as he can make impossible things possible..

He’s bek.. when i heard d news, i don quite believe it. bt my fren assured me dat he’s bek.. i oso don quite believe her somehow.. bt dat nite, i saw him in d church.. wvout any doubt, i go 4ward n ask him. he’s about d close his car door, i go top him n ask him.

d.S.1: merry christmas n hepi new year. u sure u r comin bek o not?

He: (surprised 2 c me poppin out) mayb i’ll b bek

d.S.1: eh, u don cheat me o~~~

He: haha, willl i cheat pp??

d.S.1: (too hepi n shake his hand) reli? i m so hepi, lookin 4ward 2 c u soon!!! (keep on shaking…….)

mama: johnny, it’s time 2 go lo~~

d.S.1: bye, i hope dis is true… i hope u r reli comin bek.

He: (jz smile at me) Hepi new year…

woo~~~ he’s still cool as ever.. still handsome, bt got wrinkles on his face liao lo, bt dat doesn’t matter. as long as he still knows me n as long as he’s COMIN BEK!!!!!! yo, SHS frens! i can assure u dat he’s bek.. if wrong, den don blame me.. dis is my own analysis, my own perception, my own interpretation, bt i can feel it’s true..

toking 4 so long, who is he leh?? hehe..he’s my beloved ex-principal of sacred heart, Mr. Stephen Tan. yep, he’s stephen tan, it’s true.. no mistake.. i repeat again.. stephen tan..aiyoyo, i so kepo de.. yep. he’s bek.. i trully very hepi n overjoyed. d rite man 4 SHS..

rememberin some incidents dat happen long long time ago. he’s d 1st eva person 2 giv me d impression "wow, 1 day, i wanna b like him" . my form 3 dat year, he comes 2 shs. hmm, year 2004… yep. d 1st eye when i look at him, wow, i reli respect him, dono how 2 describe it. bt he’s very kacak n most important thing, he got sth..威 in himself. how 2 say ar.. he got "power". aiyoyo, not like power ranger like dat can transform ka. bt 4 sure, if u c him b4, u’ll oso feel d same way i feel.

d 1st time i hear his voice is when 1 time, afta semester test, me n my whole gang of fren playin futbo in d undeer progress "stamford bridge’ foutbo field, den we o scolded by him..noty.. we r so noty. playin in d grass. he scolded dat d grass might die if we keep on steppin on d hvnt fully grown grass.. well dat is d 1st time..

den durin d assembly,i will pay full attention. n another thing is dat, b4 d assembly, he’ll sure pray 1st b4 we start our assembly cz we r a catholic mission school.. n his voice is so humble n powerful. i reli enjoy listening 2 his voice.. wulala, reli good! n at dat moment, i was reli proud of myself being a SHS student, very proud of my school.

den at dat yaer oso, our form 3 batch was asked 2 assist in 2 big sports events in d stadium tun zaidi, 1 is d division level n state level if not mistaken.. n in d division level, i was d head of d cleanliness team. pickin up rubbish is our duties. we muz arrive early n b d last 1 2 leave d stadium. we muz oso go patrol around 2 pick up d rubbish 2 keep d stadium clean.

i remember d last day, he belanja o of us makan d food in d food stall outside d stadium as we r d last team 2 leave, dat reli gives me a strong impression. he oso compliments us 4 doin a brilliant job, sayin dat he din even saw rubbish in d floor.. hoho.

den pmr result come out, well, he congratulated everybody n oso com4ted those who din score good results.. dat was nice of him. n form 4 year, my bziest year. i took part in many activities mayb jz 2 sharpen myself. i remember he tells me dat, he c me as a future leader, wow, trully flattered.. seriously.

in form 4, he oso selected me 2 represent SHS 2 attend a camp organised thruout in malaysia. it’s a leadership training. wow, i like d chance.. cz whole sibu only got 3 students being selected n i m 1 of those lucky pp. i reli thank him 4 dis opportunity n i reli learned a lot..

den when in d bginnin of year 2006, i was very disapointed wv d school 4 arrangin d class.. i dono la. bt dat year i reli cause a lot of problems in d school 4 challengin d authority. i know i m wrong 2 order d school 2 do sth bt i jz hv 2 speak out. cz i feel dat there is another good way of solvin d problem. i like d school, i don wan d school 2 b in chaos where many students r unhepi. i go n look 4 him, n he say he’ll ask d PK 1 2 arrange d problem.

bt @ d same moment, i oso heard dat he’ll b leavin SHS 4 kanowit n he’ll bcom d education department of sarawak o wat wat la.. not sure.. i go n tell d PK 1. at 1st, she say she will change d system. bt in d end, she ask my add-math teacher 2 tell me dat she is unhepi wv my rude attitude n she wont change d system. n my add-math teacher advices me 2 tok politely..

ei, i reli tok politelly 2 PK 1 laer. i oso hv saksi, eugene ling, he’s there oso wv me 2 approach PK1. mayb jz PK1 is jz sensitive gua. i reli besong. i ady control my anger at dat time liao, like dis fitnah saya. den i directly go n look 4 PK1. i jz ask her, hv i been rude at dat time? she din say i m rude, bt she jz say dat i shud b polite… hng~ bt in d end, i oso dono y i say sorry 2 her. i din do wrong… n she say she will change d system. 2 my expectation, she din change..

haha, ok la,. i don k so much cz stephen tan will b leavin. so, our school oso try our bez 2 keep him in d school. we oso ask d pats 2 sign on a piece of paper askin him 2 stay.. bt we failed. b4 he goes, he promise he’ll bring on another good principal, yep, he’s d present principal,, mr vincent liong who is another good principal.

in d end, he’ll hv 2 leave. bt anyway, i wish him o d bez. in d last assembly ceremony, our school organised a special assembly specially 4 him. many students giv him presents. d atmosphere was very berat hati, i think every students would want him 2 stay. cz he reli changes a lot of things in shs. our school used 2 b called samseng school, bt afta he comes, he changes d nickname. wat amazes me is dat, o those disciplined students oso turn good.. it’s trully amazing, can enter programme ripley’s blieve it o not liao lo.

his personality, his advice, his wise words, his power reli amazes me.. he reli changes a lot in me.. he makes me proud of my school, he makes my heart united wv my school n sing d school rally loudly n semangatly. everythin is instilled in me by him. so i reli respect him a lot…

n now he’s bek.. i hope he’s reli bek n he can continue 2 serve in his bloved school.. i was quite regret oso, cz 4 not studyin lower 6 at d bginin of d year n pursue 4 petronas scholarship. bt wat i can do now is jz pray 4 d school n try 2 help out as old boy of sacred heart anytime when needed. so far, i hv done my bez as an old boy.. inspirin teachers n young juniors 2 lov d school.

i still remember my 1st impression, i wanna b like stephen tan. hv d 威 in myself. i oso tryin 2 learn dat, bt it’s quite hard 4 me.. bt i’ll try my bez. i nvr doubt myself. n i will oso b like him, bek 4 SHS.. cz SHS is where i belong.. ihope dis wont change.. n if i reli comes bek, i wanna change d name "Sacred Heart Old Student Association (SHOSA)" 2 "Sacred Heart Patriot" organisation. bcz of d word old, it seems not nice. mayb patriot is nicer gua.??

so, mr stephen tan, o d bez 2 u!! we owes support u!!! i salute u!!! u r a very special person… may god giv u wisdom n holy spirit guide u in ur every doings, protect u n hope u will hv a healthy body 2 serve sacred heart school, bring out d bez from every students n make SHS recognised in national level..

wow, tamaknya saya.. hehe, sorry 4 writin too long, cz i m reli xcited bout dis.. memang saya sendiri high sendiri.. sorry.. hoehoe, bt u cant stop my mouth ~~~ dis is true me..

我有股冲动，

想把一张常发声的嘴巴，

上个拉环把它封闭，

轻率的发个誓愿，需个承诺，

胡乱出言，随便乱说，

不经意地把人心弄乱，无心地把人心弄伤。

那么的不经意，那么的轻易，

把人名弄伤，

那么的娇嫩，那么的柔，却是管不着的舌头。

主啊！我有股冲动，

我想对你说声对不起，

因为我觉得我很难控制我这张嘴，

就像一个难以阻止的一把抢，

但是，我所说的一切都是事实，

从不锦上添花，从不加盐加醋，从不相信谣言，从不拐弯抹角，

我只说我应该说的，坦率地说出正相，

虽然很容易伤到别人的心，但是我还是坚持我的风格。

我不是一个很出色的演员，

今天你看到的我的表情和脸色，

明天和后天以及明天的明天，

你将看到同样一张表情和脸色的我，

除非你用枪跪下指着我，

求我改变我所坚持的个人风格。

Christmas’s comin. i thought dis year will hv been a relaxin year where i can sit in my house, singin christmas song.. bt no. 1 phone call spoil my christmas mood.. nvr min, i do it 4 Jesus

d phone call asks me 2 do a drama on 22/12 in dataran sibu.. wulala~ it’s a grand celebration where d whole sibu can c my drama, bt it will b quite tiring as i only hv 3 days 2 prepare, nvr min, i do it 4 Jesus

bt anyway, i promise my fren n i will do a drama on 22/12. afta i put down d phone, i was vy worried bout d drama, mayb i should not promise him 1st..  now i m invitin problems 2 myself.. nvr min, i do it 4 Jesus

i hv 2 do d props, d big house, d ships.. n it takes quite a long time, mayb a week 2 finish d props, bt how can i do it alone n finish it in a short time?? luckily i got a fren of mine who help me.. den i quickly think of my characters.. n inform o those who will b acting in d drama, nvr min, i do it 4 Jesus

d story is about a flood. a boy who has been prayin hard 4 jesus 2 come 2 save him when d flood comes. 1st, was d sampan, den d motorboat, den d helicopter. d boy rejected d rescuers n say dat he is waitin 4 jesus 2 come 2 save him. in d end, he died, when in heaven, jesus tell him dat he has come 3 times, n y d boy din notice him. actually jesus r owes there 4 us when we r in trouble.nvr min, i do it 4 Jesus

den d nex day, i rush 2 buy o d stuffs dat r required 2 make d props. can u imagine a motorcycle goin round d whole sibu buying big big sticks, wv lots of selotapes n papers. pooh, luckily i din fall, reli.. bt i was thinking i was quite stupid cz i can actually ask my fren 2 help me. bt i know dis is a last minute thing, n everybody don like last minute stuff. bt i bgin 2 think i m very stupid 4 agreein 2 help out.nvr min, i do it 4 Jesus

den i ask my fren 2 help out 2 build d house. 2gether we build d house. we use 2 days complete it. wulala, it is a rush bt d house is quite well constructed, thanks 2 d 2 architects n bulders.. haha, tiong family conquers!! nvr min, i do it 4 Jesus

den it’s time 4 practices n rehearsal, i was vy lucky cz my frens r o obedient n turn up 4 d practice, i m d director of d drama, n i felt they hv giv out their bez n they reli r good actors.. nvr min, i do it 4 Jesus

den, i go n look 4 sounds n music as bekground. pooh, i din sleep at nite, when i close my eyes, i will b thinking of d drama. can say dat i don hv good sleeps. bt special thanks 2 my fren dat hv been supportin me n givin me advices so dat i can continue d drama. nvr min, i do it 4 Jesus

den d rehearsal comes. i hv 2 ask a lorry 2 help us tek our props 2 dataran sibu . luckily there is a man whol help us. woo, thank him a lot.. i reli appreciate their help. when i reach d rehearsal place, i was quite angry, actually, cz d pp iin charge langsung din respect me n my frens. they keep askin other pp 2 rehearse n put our rehearsal in d last. we arrive at 9.30 am n we only rehearse at 11.30am. nvr min, i do it 4 Jesus

my frens r o involved in d workings, they hv 2 help 2 move d stages n do other stuff, preparin d mics, n o those loso loso stuff. haha. luckily it was our time 2 rehearse. they reli giv us a lot of comments. i was vy vy api dat time, cz who is d 1 doin d drama, if it’s them, they do la. if it’s me, den me la. y u giv so many comments. we ady finish d props ady, skrang baru u giv comments. if u wanna giv, u shud giv early ma. i was criticised badly dat day. nvr min, i do it 4 Jesus

haha, den when we go bek, we leave our stuff in d stage as our props r too big, when in d noon, d wind was big n it was raining.. our props r blown by d wind, another fren of mine help me 2 put d props in d changing room, when i receive his call, i go 2 dataran sibu 2 check on d props, only d cloth of our props r wet bcz of d rain, so i let it dry by dryin it wv a fan. nvr min, i do it 4 Jesus

d nite finally comes, there r a lot of pp in dataran sibu. pooh, such a big crowd. den when our act comes.. den we giv out our bez, i was at d side, givin body languages commands 2 my frens who act as actors, bt luckily they themselves r quite clever n flexible n know wat 2 do at d suitable time. i oso ask my sis 2 record down d whole drama, haha. nvr min, i do it 4 Jesus

afta d drama, every1 claps their hands n applause.. n actually d applause was not so loud as i hv expected. bt i oso hear some laughters n screams during d drama, as there r sikit unsur funny in my drama. bt, in d end, i receive mo compliments den critices. those who criticises me in d morning oso compliment me. haha, i m very proud of my frens.. nvr min, i do it 4 Jesus

haha, luckily everythin was over, i reli felt d presence of jesus by my side helpin n guiding me.. dat’s y i say, jesus i do it 4 u n u r there 2 assist me. i wanna say thanks 2 o my frens who r actors in d drama, 2 ho-ho, my fren who ask me 2 perform d drama, 2 kong-quan who is d magnificent architect, n my father who sponsor me d tools 2 help me, my mom who help me, supports me, my family who gives me ideas during d drama, A+ 4 givin me advices n supports dat i will continue on d project.

i reli wanna thanks every1 who saw d drama. every1 who giv their fullest supports 2 me, every1 who claps n applauses afta d drama. i reli lov d pressure as i used 2 hv in form 4. bt 1 thing 4 sure, i don like last minutes stuff, cz i cant enjoy d process, n everythin was done in a hurry. d newspaper oso publish our drama .. haha.. o compliments 2 my frens!!!

luckily i control my emotion n not 2 b too angry. i jz keep d feelings 2 myself, dat i wont suddenly scold my frens.. i m proud of my 圣家之母，你们是最棒的，但是要保持谦虚谦卑的态度，继续为主服务。学辉在此会继续为你们祈祷的！！我为你们感到骄傲！！！谢谢主，赞美主！！

merry christmas..

wat a bz christmas dis season.. everythin last minute announcement.. cant reject oso, jz hv 2 do it.. d climax part is 2molo, 22/12/07, in dataran Sibu where o d pp from Sibu will come 2 enjoy d festival.

n my drama will b on oso.. n i m d producer..hehe, i hope those pp will enjoy d drama, i m not tamak, i jz wan applause n claps from d audience.. n oso hope my frens n actors wont b overxhausted..

cz i know they hv reli put in their effort 2 come 4 d rehearsal everytime. so i hope they can reli do their bez. i don doubt them, i oso nvr doubt my own ability, i jz doubt d weather 2molo, hope it wont rain, cz it has been rainin these days..

i hvnt reli enjoy d holidays dis season, i can feel dis year is d most tiring year gua.. nope, i think mine form 4 life is mo tiring oso la

haha, so dis year is vy vy last minute tiring. jzz bcz of d sudden drama calling.. pooh, nvr min. i do it 4 God n oso my church. i reli don like last minute, cz feel like cant enjoy d process..

kk, gtg do d drama stuff.. still got time write blogs, aiyoyo..

hohohohhoho, merry-go-round christmas, whole sibu.. watchout, santa d.S.1 is comin 2 town wv his drama!!!!!

Dis few days, i hv been very confused.. very confused bout my own personality.. i even like lost. haha, not so serious la. bt i feel confused. thinking bout my stand, my point. considerin bout some of my attitudes n personality.

i hv been asked by a few of my frens 2 change my attitude, try 2 b mo selfish n try 2 put myself ahead of other pp. pooh, dis is a tough 1. it’s completely contrast wv d attitude i hv. i muz b mo selfish? y? isnt it good where everybody owes considerate 4 other pp instead of themselves? d world would b a better place 2 live, there wont b so much crime n mental block in d society..

den i think of dis story where i hear very very early when i was young. perhaps it’s d 1st story i heard when i attend d sunday class in d church.. hehe. n i feel d story is quite meaningful 4 me especially when i m lost in my thinkings… d story is:

one nite, a man was dreaming, den an angel took him 2 a place where there was 2 rooms. actually those rooms r dining rooms. he went in d 1st room, when he opened d room, he was shocked 2 c dat it was in a mess, food, tables, and chairs everywhere..

he oso saw many pp in d room, wv anger n envy in their eyes. their hands were handcuffed. actually it was dinner time and they were hvin dinner, and d food is properly served on d table. their greediness turn whole dining room apart. they were merebut-rebut d food, they wanna eat o d food.. they were arguin n strugglin among themselves jz 4 d food.

d pp in d room 1 were very rude, angry wv flames in their eyes. later, they started 2 fight n throw d food around in d room. they cant fight as their hands were handcuffed. they jz cursed each other wv foul language n throw d food around.. d situation is very chaotic, kelam kabut. in d end, nobody hv d chance 2 eat as they were too bz fightin over d food. d whole atmosphere in room 1 is fulled wv envyness, angryness n unconsideration.

den d man was very disappointed n he closed d door. d angel took him 2 another room, room 2. d man don dare 2 open d 2nd door, as he was scared dat room 2 will b d same as room 1. bt, d angel calmed him n he opened d room 2.

hoho, room 2 was clean n there were sound of joy n hepiness in d room. he can feel d serenity n calmness in room 2.den he looked at d pp in room 2. 2 his astonishment, their hands were oso handcuffed like those in room 1, bt their situation were completely different from those in room 1.

there was no food in d floor, d condition was very clean. d pp were feedin each other. as their hands were handcuffed, it was quite difficult 4 them 2 eat by themselves, so they helped each other by feeding each other. there were xpressions of joy n hepiness in their eyes.

they were chattin politely among themselves. it was very serene n peaceful. everybody was enjoyin d dinner. none of them were cursin o fightin like those in room 1. room 2 n room 1 was completely different. d man felt very hepi n calm when he saw d situation. den, a man from room 2 asked d man 2 join them 4 d dinner. bt d man rejected politely n said dat he got sth else needed 2 b done. n he left room 2 wv a hepi mood, touched by d pp. d atmosphere was helpful, calm, peaceful, serene n considerate.

den d angel xplained 2 d man, actually room 1 is hell, while room 2 is heaven. d man thought 4 a lito while n agreeded wv wat d angel told him. now i ask everybody, which room do u prefer, of cz everybody will say room 2.. as there were hepiness n peace in it.

i dono y i thought of dis story. i wanna live in heaven, so dat’s y i wanna b like those in room 2, not too selfish, owes think 4 others, considerate, helpin those who face difficulties. i don wanna live in hell, i don wanna b selfish, i don wanna b angry wv anybody , i don wanna hate anybody…

i jz wanna make everybody feel com4table, make them feel like they r livin in heaven, like those in room 2. i wanna help everybody when they face difficulties. i wanna c everybody hepi, everybody smilin, everybody …. hepi, dat is my wish thruout d whole year. wish everybody hepi n bahagia..

so, i wanna say sorry 4 some frens.. i cant change it. it requires a lot of time n courage 2 b a selfish person. i will try 2 b a lito bit selfish la.. hehe.. hope d p on earth wil b like those in room 2, not selfish.. n owes think  n put other pp ahead of themselves..

so, i still wanna b me, d.S.1.. hehe. i m clear of my stand n my personality now, i m not lost now… where m i? i m in heaven.. who m i? i m d.S.1

Something is easy 2 say bt hard 2 b done.. not something is very hard 2 say.. haha// very hard 2 say? i don think so.. i think something is easy 2 say, bt hard 2 get it done.. dis is more accurate

so don cincai say anythin if u urself cant get d thing done.. givin comments n criticisms r easy bt get it done is another matter.. pp ask u 4 criticism bt they only wan praise.. some of d pp act like dis. they only wan praise instead of criticism.

so, b4 u advise ur fren, better think properly if u can do it o not.. if u urself cant do it, den better don say out d advice. bt, if u feel dat ur idea is good, den u shud try 2 b humble n say out ur idea. speak wv confidence, don make other pp feel u’re very arrogant n proud.

sometimes i can feel dat some pp r crossin d limit in wat they r sayin bout other pp. some pp like 2 bekside(bekslash) d subject by criticisn d subject bhind d subject in front of d subject’s frens. dis is very hurt. sometimes, i feel bad 4 d person too when i c d person bekside his/her own fren..

den, d person will try 2 spread d rumours, addin spices, tomatoes, chillies, garlics, soya souces in order 2 make d criticisms mo interestin n tasty.. i jz cant stand dat.. sometimes, i rather keep quiet n not 2 tek part in d criticisms.. i don hv 2 blieve wat have been told, i got my own opinion, my own stand..

i owes open my ears 4 criticisms. bt i don k bout those stupid comments, i reflect n hope i’ll not repeat it ever again. so when my fren tellin my weak points 2 me, i will reli listen.. i m not a perfect man, bt i wanna b as perfect as i can.. dat’s y perfect practices make perfect..

being critical n destructive is a much mo appealin den praises.. some criticisms r made wvout brain. dat’s wat i call stupid comments.. so, it will b nice 2 silence those who hv been critical.  bt frankly speakin, i like 2 criticise pp.. if only i feel i can do better den d person, if not i will jz shut my mouth n grit my teeth.. thinkin of a better solution. dat’s y i like 2 help my frens.. cz we shud help each other.

bt u will not stop me from givin out comments. some pp say i m arrogant, some say i m too bossy, some say i m too good, some say i m too kepo, some say i m too childish.. so wat? i m not a good actor, wat u c on my face 2day,u’ll oso  it 2molo n d days afta 2molos unless u point me wv a gun n beg me 2 change my personality.

rumours hv been quite destructive. rumours make pp wear masks n pretendin in front of other pp. 4 eg., i hv heard a lot of bad things bout a pp, when i face d pp, i hv 2 act like i know nothin bout d pp. so, wat cause dis?/ rumours.. i reli don hate rumours..

if u reli hate some1, jz go in front of d person n say it loud. don bekside other pp. u may bekside a person, bt please la, don bekside n spread it 2 o ur frens.. n 4 d listeners.. please oso la. don easily blieve other pp, u hv 2 xperience it wv ur eyes, den baru u can certify dat d rumours r true o not.. n 4 d subject himself, try not 2 display out ur weakness out so dat pp wont hv rumours bout u..

bt frankly speakin, it’s very hard not 2 tok bad words bout other pp. seriously… bt i hope o dis thing wont happen again nex year.. seriously.. i reli hope those who likes 2 criticise please think b4 u tok..

i dono y i write so much bout dis things.. i wanna write mo, bt i remember wat my frens told me,, not 2 write 2oo much in m blogs..

haha, so i think i’ll stop here. bt i reli wanna continue.. haiya.. jz biarkan la. so, something r easy 2 say, bt very hard 2 get it done. bt please remember dis, i will owes sit on d fence, i wont climb inside d house, nor climb outside 2 d road.. i will jz sit in d mido till i hv figured out d truth, den i’ll make my decision based on my perception n time.

sorry 4 been very loso.. bt i reli hope there wont b any rumours nex year.. hope everythin will b fine n start o over again.. cz we r FRENS…. ———–> d.S.1