d life of d.S.1

牛是一种很固执的动物。有绿油油的草地，就会有它的出现，可说是应有尽有。它是草食动物，绝不吃肉，是吃素的。牛每次嘴一直啃着草，要把草咬得嚼碎才把草吞进它那大大的肚子。当它被那些青爽的绿草引诱时，就不可自拔，慢慢享受着那些美味的草。一片望着是无穷尽的绿草，草连天，天连草，十分过瘾。

不管它的主人怎样鞭打它，诬骂它，讽刺它，贬低它，取笑它，它都不会去理他的，因为它觉得它正在享受那摆在眼前美味又香喷喷的芳草。它那种“无所谓”的眼神令主人更加生气，于是主人就很生气地骂它：“你这只臭牛，你继续吃吧！吃到饱！我以后不管你了，看你怎样回家，你自己救自己吧。”

主人就扔下那只牛走了。牛还在很过瘾地在吃草，吃到闷了，就看看天，吃饱了，就躺着睡，吃腻了，就看看天上的小鸟，吃累了，就在草地上打滚，十分逍遥，完全没有压力，没有烦恼，没有担心，只有“草”，它的最爱，它的享受。

虽然它知道这样下去不是一个好办法，因为总有一天，那些草一定会被它吃完的，但它不像酿多，它说等草吃完了在打算。它那条尾巴，无时无刻都在摇晃着，给路人带来开心和娱乐。但是它一生气时，就闷闷不乐的，去会发脾气，用它那尖锐的牛角来刺伤伤害它的人，绝不让那人逃跑，它一定要教他一个教训。

有一天，它的主人又回来了，主人又再次劝它回家，但是它还是不要，因为它很喜欢那片草地，还是不想回去，因为那里就是它的家了。不管主人怎样劝它，但是都白费心机，还是没有办法引诱它离开那片草地。那只牛若一找到自己兴趣的东西，就会永不分离的每天对着那些草。不管别人怎样劝它，它都不听。

总有一天，草真的完了，那只牛又依依不舍的离开那里。想了想，若没有食物，它怎么活？若没有开拓新地盘，可能新地盘的草更香脆？于是，它就离开了它那最爱的草地，去了新的地方。它一到了新地方，哇，的确这里的草很美味，很有营养，很有价钱值，可说是鼎鼎大名的出名草。

吃着吃着，它仿佛觉得不够亲切，感觉没有像上次那样爽。因为上次的那个草地，已是它的家了。但是它那个牛脾气还在，它试着慢慢习惯新草地，但是一切都不能。它那以前倔强的态度似乎不能再使用了，所以它只好慢慢的改，慢慢改掉它那“牛”脾气，以便它能真正的做一只特别的牛。

慢慢来吧，阿牛！！！

some things we muz tek it seriously…
some things we can tek it play playly..
bt i hv been tekin studeis not seriouslly… dat is d major problem i m facing.. i dono how 2 be concentrated in my studies.. i keep givin a lot of reasons 2 myslef.. mayb i m not d study type? mayb i m injured n owes thinking bout my leg? mayb i don like utp? mayb i m not mature enough? mayb mayb mayb.. a lot of maybs..
bt only wv 1 question… y i cant tek my studies seriously?? y?
i tried 2 study d chapters, i read bt i cant understand, mayb jz d mood is not here… o mayb i found out it is too easy till i don k so much bout it? eleh, i don think so..
haiz.. bt alot of things r buzzing me.. how i wish i m in my school.. no pressure, no rumours, no gossips, only futbo, freedom 2 go anywhere, only shs, only frens, only jokers, only home, only true me..
i try 2 bring my personalities from shs 2 here… bt i m strugglin 2 bring out d bez of myself.. bt, i start 2 question myself, y i wanna bring out d bez of myself? ya la… y leh?
so, afta a long thougt, i can mengesahkan i got mentality problem.. aiyoyo, mayb can hantar 2 kucihng 7 miles, o tanjung rambutan…. y there is no teluk papaya leh?? papaya is nicer laer…
well, hope i ccan get well soon, my mentality n oso my physical (my poor leg)… how long will it need 2 recover. seems 2 lose patience wv him.. bt anyway, i can only wait til u fully recover till i can run..

I jz cant stop comparin my SHS n d present UTP. i reli cant stop thinking bout it. if i reli hv 2 compare physically, UTp of cz is a lot better den my SHS…

bt i often try 2 make myself lov utp bt i found it hard 4 me 2 like utp. i still remember when i 1st time enter SHS,d 1st time i sing d school rally, i m vy proud of my school. i try 2 memorize my school lyrics. dat time i was still a small kid, i dono d meaning of d lyric.

now as i grown up, now i catch up d meaning of d lyrics. mayb i’ll discuss it in my SHS group discussion.. haha. bt utp din giv me d feeling of proud n home as i receive in SHS. SHS gives me a feeling like home, calmness, hepi, and d most important is responsibilities n commitment.

in utp, i don hv those feelings, mayb bcz of d staffs n d pp here. though utp hv d bez facilities in d world wv world class chancellor hall, world class classes, world class library, bt they don hv d "heart".. when i say d word "heart", i mean they provide me a safe shelter like a mum’s hug..

how’s it feel under a mum’s hug… feel protected, warm, like u r not afraid of anythin, feel courageous n brave, at d same time, u oso wanna protect ur mom like dat.. dat feeling is fantastic, which i only get in SHS. not here in UTP.. reli not here. utp 4 me, is like a place 4 students 2 graduate..

i prefer person’s personality den studies. i know i m not d type of pp who likes study, i jz know, if i got study hard bt den my result is not good, i will b satisfied. d last time when i step out from my school in d speech day last year, i hope dat i can hv d same feeling in utp.. bt vy mengecewakan… it’s not here

i hv try 2 force o motivate myself 2 lov utp.. bt reli not here. i cant say dat i don like utp, bt i don hv d feeling 2wards shs. i dono y i like 2 compare, like i sot sot like dat. memang… if i so love shs, den y i don wanna study lower 6 in shs??

1 thing i was sure dat, if i still lock myself in d past, den i wont b able 2 develope myself.. i will stay mundur n wont b maju. i wont b maju if i still hv d attitude, dat’s y i prefer 2 come here.i started 2 think if 1 day, d name of UTP changed 2 SHS, will i still like d school?

hmm, i think nope. cz here dont hv d feeling of "love"… i cant feel d feeling here.. so much 4 o d rubbish… mayb i can try 2 keep myself occupied wv lots of homeworks so dat i wont hv d time 2 think of it, o mayb i can try 2 change my perspective, o mayb i can jz let it b like dat//

haiz.. somebody help me.. i felt i m very imbalanced now.. i need 2 balance again my mentality.. SOS…

i think dis year’s CNY is quite successful though there r some unwanted situations from d weather n some pp… n 4get 2 tell, sibu town is nearly flooded 2day la.. hoho, bt it’s cool when u ride a motorcycle in d rain 2 visit ur frens n teachers house jz 2 minta … ehem/..///
we started off at 8.45 sharp n finish at 4.45pm.
hehe, received 13 angpows, n visited i think hmm…17 houses in  a day.. it is quite a good record n i think it is better den last year, cz we spend most of d time in d road traffic jam.. motorcycle is good, fast, hepi, merry,enjoyin, lightning, posing, cool~~~~ motorcycle is a lot better den car
dis year, i introduce a new year of "bai nian", it can save mo time n let them know d real meaning of "bai nian".. hope my frens can spread it around…~~~
bt 1 thing i regret is we only spend like 15 minutes in a house, if nex time, we can stay longer.. n we can chat longer. n remember 2 bring on some talkative pp so dat mulut wont dry up..
got a teacher forcin us 2 bring our partner in d nex bai nian.. eleh, teacher not so fast la.. students like us shud rajin belajar dulu… hoho..
hornin sembarangan in d road, jokin vy loud in d house, drivin in d rain, kacau pp when pp is drivin.. dis r d things we do, n i reli enjoy.. at d other corner, i bgin 2 wander, when can we b so childish again? so many frens r changing..
bt i hvnt change at o~ i m still vy childish, vy talkative…. as usual, bt i tihnk i hv grown matured in other way.. in my handling stuffs. so dat’s y i say dis year might b a lito bit chaotic bt i consider it as successful.
dat is my opinion nia, bt i think mayb in others’ mind, it is good n somebody think it is not good..
well, nex year i m goin 2 do it again.. 2 keep d tradition movin.. n we hv won over methodist when we r in stephen tan house..
our numbers r bigger den them.. haha , chang chi ar~~~ n we got our procedures n fluency..
well, kenny ling, chieng kai hua, eugene ling, kong khai jien, frederick lee, albert ng, gabriel wong, rodney lau, george sia, jude ngu, luk kuok jie, christopher wong, ung shih shao, ting zing seng,tiong charng siew, lee chiong heng, lee chiong wee, jeffrey lau…
remember out date nex year.. same time, same period, same pp… bt bring along ur partners if can.. n babies oso, if reli possible la…
hehe, hepi CNY~~~~~
still wanderin 2molo wanna go o not..
hoho
nite nite

Everybody’ll face d same situation

it’s not only u, it’s everybody

everybody face it in their lifes

no matter how good u r, o how mature u r

pp tend 2 get carried away by emotions, feelings

n sometimes we’ll b disappointed when we face difficulties

bt remember don giv up

cz everybody’ll face it oso

B tough, my dear sis

homeworks, burdens, different lifestyles, safety n frens

r d obstacles u hv 2 endure

so, don b afraid

jz face it wv ur open arms,

don cry, don b sad, don get frustrated,

receive it wv ur open ears 2 listen

wv open eyes 2 seek 4 pp 2 help

wv open nose 2 smell d difficulties

wv open mouth 2 voice up wheneva u got problem

wv open minds 2 think 4 d pros n cons

wv open hearts 2 face o these challenges

b ready 4 everythin…

B tough, my lito sis

though u hv matured n grown up

bt u r still my young lito cute sis in my mind

sometimes i don wanna teach u in ur studies,

n u blame me 4 not teachin u

pls 4giv me cz i wan u 2 learn it urself

sometimes u blame me 4 an issue

n i owes giv some excuses 4 it

actually i wan u 2 grow up by urself n seek 4 ur own ways

i know u r capable of doin sth,

n don b scared

i will lend u a hand if i know u r hvin hard time

bt i think u wont know

cz i din show my feelings in dis

i owes ignore u

bt deep inside my heart

i hope u know how 2 b independent n think 4 urself

B a clever speaker, my lito sis

if u cant do anythin, jz say u cant

don force urself 2 say yes

think b4 u say, speak nicely b4 u blame

everythin  u need 2 control it

don let ur anger rule u

u shud rule ur anger

k 4 mo others, as u receive a lot of cares from pp

as u r d youngest, n everybody cares 4 u everyday

so, think 4 others feelings 1st b4 u speak out

B tough, my lito sis,

remember dis, don eva giv up

when u face o kinds of difficulties when we r not bside u

b tough, b smart n b kful

of dis cunnin society nowadays

mayb u cant feel my cares 4 u,

bt i reli k 4 u, cz

u r owes my youngest, lito, cutie sis….

remember 2 pray 4 urself n ur family

n most importantly

remember dis,,,,

u r not alone

u got ur family rite bhind ur bek…

b tough,

my lito sis   :-)

promise me, ok?

love, d.S.1

2day, i hv a CNY gatherin wv o my classmates from SHS.. haha, it’s been a long time i din c them. i think quite a long time we din sit down n hv a chat 2gether. n no doubt, my fren hantar me there bcz of my condition, can walk now, bt d doc advise me not 2 use too many strength n not 2 often use my rite leg

bt at least now i can walk small small step slowly as a snail.. well, when i c my frens, they reli still remember me.. haha, n my painful n injured leg oso. well, thanks, frens.. thanks 4 ur k n attention n ur blessings.. i reli appreciate it. memang terima kasut.. hoho terima kasih la~

n 1 thing 4 sure, they still remember i m a futbo kaki.. hehe, n afta d gatherin, some of them go play futbo in futsal court. n some of them even asked me 2 join them …. afta i hv reli recovered. n a lot of them oso encouraged me 2 get rest properly so dat i can return 2 d field wv them again..

pooh, i m reli hopin 4 d day 2 come soon.. yep, asap will b better. i c them playin, kaki memang gatal sangat. i try 2 lift d bo wv my rite leg, bt my rite leg is too weak.. n i was scolded by my frens.. they asked me 2 watch d game n don eva touch d bo until i hv fully recovered… haha..

bt when i c them playin, my kaki n my heart was vy desperate.. vy desperate 2 get 2 d field n get scorin again. bt now i jz hv 2 put aside o dis 1st n rest my leg.. ferreira, i m waitin 4 u 2 fully fit n i trust u can get d goals comin.

i heard o d doctors n some of my frens say dat my leg will not b as good as 4. haha, i oso know dis, bt slowly slowly la, ferreira, i don force u 2 b as good as b4, bt jz try 2 b urself. i wont force u 2 play whenever u r tired..

n now, my last treatment will b 2molo, hope 2 hear good news from d doc 2 my ferreira. n i was hopin dat i will b bek 2 d field soon, bcomin d King of Stamford Bridge once again..

thanks, frens…. u guys better keep on playin good futbo cz i catch up d flow of d game vy fast o~~~ hehe.. don don don qian~~~

Frustrated!! frustration!! n more frustration!!!

y my leg is bengkok de???? i can walk a lito bit now, small pace bt y my leg is bengkok… does dis mean dat i cant play futbo o walk properly like a normal human??? i m reli gettin frustrated.. mayb i jz need a physio 2 help me adjust bek my leg 2 straight.

poor ferreira, i m still thinkkin if i don play futbo on dat wednesday, den u’ll b fine… haiz.. bt once it happened, i bet it happended 4 a reason. bt wat is d reason?? is it i m not good in futbo n i shud quit playin futbo? o is it i hv been thinkin too much bout futbo n it wans me 2 study now?? yoo hoo~~ can anybody tell me d answer??

reli frustrated!!!!!! like wanna kaboom my head ady.. haiz.. reli suffering.. cant walk. cant do wat d things i like. normally, i use 2 slide in my schools office.. run vy fast den slide on d cement floor.. woohoo.. it’s super cool~~~

bt haiz.. y m i injured?? y m i so careless? y don i b careful when i m playin futbo? n now, wat is d treatment i suppose 2 receive? jz restin?? n restin will cure my leg? i think i need a physio urgently!!!

mayb dis noon, i will go 4 physio n seek advices from d doc.. no futbo n no play makes johnny a dull boy……

It has been a week dat i hv been injured.. n now, i m now at my home.. afta being asked by my parents 2 go bek on sunday. mizz 2 weeks of classes.. yahoo.. bt i miss d chance 2 b d 1st 1 2 greet o my frens hepi CNY!! normally i will sing new year song whenever i wake up in d morning.

haiz. bt now, no mood 2 sing liao. bt if compared wv last week, my leg is now recovering. it jz needs time. on d way 2 recovery, i can say like dat.. now, my rite leg can bend, can twist here n there wvout any problem, bt jz a lito bit of pain. bt now i can walk liao. bt very weak..

TIME!!! can u tick faster.. i wanna return 2 d field 2 play futbo again. dis few days, i stayed at home. dono do wat oso. bt i hvfinished watchin digimon tamers 03 in youtube. 51 episodes.. hehe, nothing 2 do  ma,. so watch digimon lo

bt i bgin 2 think of those futballers who has serious injury n worse den me.. they b bek 2 d journey of futbo afta several months n even years.. me? haiz.. cant walk now la.. think so much 4 wat

djibiril cisse, broken leg 4 2 times, bt afta a year of strugglin n recoverin, he’s bek n now scorin many goals 4 marseille… dis is d spirit i oso wan 2 learn. well, his case is serious den me. he got broken leg ler.. mine got pulled knee ligament. which 1 is mo serious?

of cz his la. bt he still got d determination 2 play futbo.. dis noon, i ask my mom whether i can still play futbo, wvout htinking she say no wv a fierce look.. i jz sit n eat my lunch.. y cant? bt i wil make sure i hv recovered fully n fully fit. n i wan my form 2 b bek, i still wan my leg’s form bek..

now, i try 2 imagine dat my rite leg is a newborn baby, hvnt know n learn how 2 walk.. bt slowly slowly it will grow up n 1 day, kapow!!! it will b d bez leg… in utp i guess.. haha..

bt now, i jz hope i can walk dulu. i don ask 4 mo. walk 1st.. my leg.. by d way, i giv my rite leg a name, ferreira n my left leg, bridge..

haha, ferreira n bridge.. well, ferreira, get well soon. pp wanna c u performin again in futbo~~ bridge, cheer him up wheneva he is down..

i oso wanna thank my frens in utp.. especially my closest buddy.. they r d bez, carryin me around when i m injured. n my frens who k 4 me, sms me n msn me askin me bout my condition… n i oso wanna thank a person especially, she teach me a way 2 recover faster. she ask me 2 talk 2 my leg everyday, try 2 motivate him.. well, i do dat every moment when i m alone..

haha, now ferreira is recoverin. d utp league dis year, i beriya iya utk take part, bt now, i think hv 2 postpone 2 nex year liao.. ok. ferreira, listen properly… get well soon, buddy. i still need u n u still got a lot of skills 2 b performed… i’ll pray 4 u, hope u guys oso..

I injured my rite knee when I was playin futbo last nite.. I think it is quite a terrible injury I hv so far.. cz I completely cant walk.. I cant even stand up. I jz hv 2 sit there. I stretched out my reite leg 2 stop my fren from kickin d bo, bt his shoot was too powerful n I can say like i twist my rite knee 2 d rite side.

It was such a pain. I jz lie down there wvout movin. 1^st of o, I thought it is still 4 a while, den afta several mins, I can start playin again. Bt not dis time.. I try 2 stand up, bt cant. My frens help me 2 stand up bt I cant stand up usin my rite leg. My rite leg can stretch straight. It was a total disaster.. I cant imagine it is happenin 2 me..

Den got many things wonderin in my mind, dislocation, sprained, twist, ligament damage… bt dis time it happens on my knee, my leg, my rite leg. Long time ago, I hv thought of dis matter, if 1 day, I cant walk o play futbo, den I will b finished. I lov my legs.. wvout them, I will b like dead.. OKU.. cant do anything, everythin hv 2 b assisted by other pp. I cant do wat I wan, I cant go play futbo, I cant go SHS, I cant go celebrate CNY, I cant go rush my stuff, I cant help my frens if I m in dis condition..

While my frens r worryin, I try 2 convince dat I m ok n ask them 2 continue d game. Bt they din. They r rite there sitin bside me. I try 2 cheer them up, haha. Bt they r still worryin.. den joel n wenzhen go n buy ice 4 me. Ice will reduce d pain? I don think so. I know dat dis time it is vy serious case.. mayb I wont b able 2 walk….. I was vy scared, feelin like telling d whole world n ask 4 help.

Den they carry me bek 2 my hostel, wa. Vy song ler.. looks like an emperor carryin around.. don don don qiang… haha, bt once we got bek, they send me 2 d UTP clinic, den d UTP clinic ask me go 2 d batu gajah hospital.. wulala, den I start 2 realize dat dis is vy serious. D doc in UTP say dat it can b dislocation.. DISLOCATION~~!!!??!! I was puzzled.. I remember wat happen 2 damien duff, arjen robben, Michael owen, they r out 4 more den 6 months.. I don wanna b like them.

I wanna walk, I wanna run.. I still got a lot of things 2 b done.. god, don let me b paralyzed..

I m very scared n I only pray at dat time, den we got a senior lead d way 2 d batu gajah hospital, well, d doc ask me 2 go visit him 2day noon 2pm like dat.. actually got go same as not go.

He din giv me any medicine n say dat it is an emergency room n only 4 emergency case.. gr~~ my case not emergency meh? I will b paralyzed 4 my whole life, u goin 2 tek k of me ar??

I was vy depressed. Bt I jz wanna sleep.. well, jz hope everythin will b ok..

Hope 2 run in d SHS Stamford bridge soon… jesus, I ask

ur

help as a beggar ask alms, will u help me..

dis is oso a piece of material i write in d camp.. hehe. hohohohoh

b4 dis, i m blur bout my own target. i feel like i hv achieve everythin. i totally hv no motivation, like there’s no urge inside me anymo. d urge has jz gone like dat. still remember when i m in SHS, there’s owes an urge in my heart. "2 make SHS d bez!!".. now i m in UTP, mayb i hvnt start 2 lik utp gua..

bt when i saw d petronas clip dat i hv seen in d STE camp. it totally changes my perspective 2wards petronas. b4 dis, i thought dat petronas is a rich company dat r meant 2 their own pp n 4 business purposes. bt now, i will say "petronas,i salute u"

"energy received, energy returned, aspire every1" dis is d quote i like. petronas is not only a business coorporation o organization. it’s hv their own objectives. they oso judge other pp’s feelings. they don only search 4 oils in d country, they oso help 2 develope those countries. is is d spirit i like in petronas, 2 inspire n aspire others.

now i nkow wat r my targets, goals n missions, 2 inspire others as well. now i’ll hv 2 study hard dulu 2 accomplish my goals.. not 2 say i hv 2, bt say i choose 2 study hard. haha, i choose 2 study hard so dat i can accomplish my goal. now i hv a clear goal in my mind.

n thoughts is a matter, bt action r another matter.. haha, study hard??? mayb i wont make it cz i m owes lazy.. bt sure i will hv 2 do other stuff..

bt thanks 2 petronas, they let me understand d importance of study.. hoho. bt, dis year, d.S.1 is goin 2 snS every1!!. yipee yaya yipee yipee ya, snS.. quite a nice short form… hohohohoho